New McDonald’s Adult Happy Meal Toys Are Pretty Ugly

The promotional image shows a McDonald's Happy Meal box and Cactus Plant Flea Market promotional toys.

“A member of the McDonald’s OG mascots?
Image: McDonald’s / Cactus Flea Market / Kotaku

As the latest example of how not to let your memes be dreams, McDonald’s announced that adults can get back to their inner child by opening the Happy Meal and discovering their very own toy. Yes, Adult Happy Meal toys will be in demand, at least for a limited time.

BUT McDonald’s promo page shows that the new Happy Meal is a crossover with Flea market cacti, a fashion streetwear company. Instead of getting any toy that McDonald’s gives away to kids, adults who order a box of food at the cactus plant flea market will receive either stylized figurines of McDonald’s Grimace, Hamburglar, or Birdie mascots, or one of CPFM’s original characters, Cactus Buddy. The promotion will last from 3 to 30 October.

This news comes from weird facebook post from McDonald’s, in which the fast food company said: “One day you ordered a Happy Meal for the last time and you didn’t even know it.” I’m not sure if the McDonald’s social media rep wanted people to take this as some kind of threat, but the fact that he had just left his message was ominous. It turns out that McDonald’s was existentially concerned not with the fragility of the human body, but with the longevity of the inner child. Also a premonition, but suitable for marketing purposes, I suppose.

The promotional image features an artist illustrating future McDonald's adult toys.

Image: McDonald’s / Cactus Flea Market / Kotaku

Read more: McDonald’s Pokemon Card Happy Meals are back, but fans are unhappy

If you look at everything in a big way, advertising can be useful by giving young people a little respite from the heartbreaking disappointment of adults who buy the entire supply of toys advertised by children. The point is that in McDonald’s Pokemon The Happy Meal promotion last month assumed that customers would receive Pokemon a spinner toy, a Pikachu cardboard coin and a pack of four holographic trading cards. Instead, many got leftovers Space Jam 2 toys after a bunch of speculators bought McDonald’s stock of monster pocket cards in bulk.

It wasn’t the first time Scalpers raise their heads during the Happy Meal campaign for children. It’s safe to say adults will only compete with themselves over CPFM’s Happy Meal toys, because I doubt any zoomers even know who the OG McDonald’s mascot is other than Sir Ronald McDonald. That’s probably for the best, given that a Google search for a Hamburg restaurant will likely scare them for life if they ever discover McDonald’s’ troubling 2015 rebrand. Yes, IRL Hamburglar is realand he will hurt you if he gets the chance.

Let’s hope we don’t see a repeat of people making fools of themselves on October 3rd, as they did during Rick and Morty Szechuan sauce smash. Considering how ugly these things are, regulars of clown delicacies probably don’t need to worry.

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