Explanation of the chess grandmaster conspiracy with the anal bead

Hans Niemann proclaims his innocence during an interview after the tournament.

The modern world of chess championships is not only long games and intricate openings. there is twitch dramarobots that break children’s fingersand now: anal beads. Last week, World Champion Magnus Carlsen lost to GM Hans Niemann in a stunning upset. Fraud allegations began to fill the air. But how could the alleged deception have been perpetrated? That’s when the hero we all needed on Reddit rushed to fill the void and suggested that Niemann could have used a sex toy to get a coded message that would lead him to victory.

It doesn’t matter that the post on Reddit was clearly a joke from an extremely dedicated person. The theory is too compelling to ignore. This is crazy, but only on the threshold of feasibility. Maybe that’s why, a week after Niemann’s unlikely win, people can’t help but obsess over the fact that he vowed to play naked if that’s what people needed to see to make sure he wasn’t cheating. But if you haven’t followed the latest drama in the chess world, let me come back and break it all down.

How did Niemann beat Carlsen?

That question was on everyone’s mind when the 19-year-old managed to knock out the five-time world champion at the $500,000 Sinquefield Cup in St. Louis, Missouri, last week. The two had never played before and Niemann was clearly the weaker and less experienced player. In addition, he played black.

The two came face to face three days into the tournament on September 5th when Carlsen made an early mistake and Niemann managed to force him into a difficult endgame. Grandchestour reports that the counterattack with the bishop on the 13th move was especially devastating. Things went downhill until Carlsen eventually lost in time.

One could just stop there – a brilliant streak of Niemann’s creative play and a few unfortunate misses by Carlsen, while both continue to participate in the tournament as usual – but instead the world champion got on twitter to cast a shadow of potential foul play on the whole thing. “I withdrew from the tournament,” he wrote to everyone’s shock. Notorious Clip on YouTube European football coach and professional sleazy boy José Mourinho, who said: “If I talk, I’m in big trouble.” For his part, Niemann said he was ready for a championship line of play because he had accidentally viewed the version of it used earlier that day in a 2018 match in preparation for the match.

Grandmaster Twitch star fanning the flames

Fraud allegations started making their way through the Chess subreddit and social media, but streamer Hikaru “GMHikaru” Nakamura was one of the biggest names to start discussing the possibility on his platform. He primarily focused on a past case of Nieman cheating on, which the 19-year-old admitted to doing.

But he refrained from saying that anything nefarious ever happened “over the board”, meaning when Niemann was face to face with an opponent. He certainly didn’t downplay the accusations, and the drama became a source of great influence on Twitch and YouTube. At some point, even Felix “xQc” Lengyel tried to briefly enter into action.

Niemann: I have NEVER cheated at the board | Round 5

Niemann later responded in his exit interview on September 6, criticizing Nakamura and denying anything nefarious. “I have never cheated at the board,” he said. “If they want me to strip completely naked, I will,” he later added in an interview.

He left his harshest words for Nakamura. on twitter. “Hikaru plays the role of the victim, but seems to forget that he devoted several hours of his broadcast to criticizing all my interviews with flippant insinuations,” he wrote the next day. “Perhaps he deserves to be blamed and should take responsibility for what he said. At least he has 42% more followers now.”

Okay, but what about anal beads?

While there is no evidence that Nieman cheated, that hasn’t stopped a lot of people from speculating about how he could have done it. Tournaments strict in their safetyand it’s not like you can start consulting a chess program (which Nieman has done in the past) when everyone is watching and your opponent is only a few feet away from you.

During Twitch broadcast of Chessbrah after the Nieman match, the chat suggested anal beads as one of the solutions. Canadian grandmasters Eric Hansen and Aman Hambleton began to beat him, and german socket wrote everything about it. But one Reddit user went much further and suggested that anal beads might be to blame. How exactly? “The real answer is actually elementary”, fasting started. Actually, it’s quite difficult. In fact, the crappy post accuses Carlsen of using anal beads to cheat throughout his chess career (with the exception of the few times he was too drunk to feel them properly).

Eventually, the anal bead supercomputer design was stolen and used by Niemann against Carlsen. In fact, Niemann didn’t even know how to use them properly, but the signals from his anal rosary interfered with the signals from Carlsen’s anal rosary, which is why the latter played so badly. In the end, however, Carlsen was unable to reveal how Niemann cheated without involving himself. Not quite the perfect chess crime, but all you need for a top r/Chess commentary. The user was showered with gold on Reddit. Mods removed the post. But it was too late.

The screenshot shows the anal bead theory as originally posted on r/Chess.

“Currently obsessed with the idea that Hans Niemann is cheating at the Sinquefield Cup chess tournament using wireless anal beads that vibrate him with the correct moves,” wrote Twitter user Babble__ in September 7th tweet reference to Niemann’s post-tournament interview, which immediately blew up the public.

To reiterate, there is still no evidence that Nieman cheated, although it was announced on September 8 that he would removed from did nothing to allay suspicion. And, of course, there is no evidence that any kind of anal beads were used in Carlsen’s stunning defeat. But what if the theory behind anal beads could actually work? The truth will be revealed to those who are brave enough to reveal it. One thing is certain: all eyes will be on Niemann’s next match if he chooses to play naked. Did you hear it? This is the sound of the new Twitch metabrew. God will forgive us.

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